Losing Tail Part – 2

Now continuing from Part-1, I’ll focus on the counter-measures to escape stalkers and certain surveillances as well (similar principles apply).

First, you gotta remember, your stalker is already a step ahead of you, since they know about you. But you on the other hand, have yet to identify them. So you can’t afford to fall behind in this chase or you’ll lose before you can take action.

What do I mean by “fall behind”? Well, for one, be observant (More on Observation below) rather than living in your own world where everyone ceases to exist besides your phone and pokemon apps. That’s a good place to start.

So! Let’s begin with the list now, mmkay?

 

Observation

Like I said, being observant of not only your surroundings but also the people in your surroundings is the first step in losing someone who is following you, without this you‘re never gonna know anything about anyone who‘s watching you, effectively making you lose the battle before it begins. Keep your eyes and ears open and your mind clear, keep calm, not paranoid, learn to notice the little details in your environment, study the normal behavior of people around you, so you can pick up the abnormal behavior with relative ease.

 

Identification

If you’re observant in your day-to-day life, you will be able to pick off odd behaviors from people. Why? It’s simple, while you have been observing people, your brain has been doing more than just observing them, it has been studying the behavioral patterns of average individuals who walk past you everyday. It has been picking up on subtle and obvious behaviors and physical cues that people who go about their businesses normally have. Your brain is familiar with how an individual acts when they’re not a threat. So, if you do come across a stalker, their behavioral pattern will stand out to you as odd and unnatural, which would make you aware of the presence of a possible threat. Now, another thing, whenever you want to turn around to look at your stalker, don’t. There have been many who recommend using a reflective surface to view the stalker, yes, that’s old school stuff, works many times, I don’t question it, but the thing is, we live in 2016, almost everyone have smart phones with HD cams on them, even on the front for “selfies” and stuff, so use ‘em, yeah? That way, you won’t have to try and find a (barely) reflective surface to try and find a stalker who’s probably really good at hiding and look even more unnatural than the stalker following you. But since everyone has their heads in their phones, you being one of them would look much more natural, just turn on the camera, turn it towards you, get it to your face level and look and/or take a picture to confirm the identity of the stalker and to show to the police later. Some also tell you to sit down and look at people, well, yeah, that can work, but again, it depends on the kind of stalker you’re dealing with. In certain cases, you’d just be giving the stalker the opportunity to close the distance between them and you, I mean you don’t know why they’re after you, do you now. You don’t want to leave anything to chance during the identification process (or any other process really). So, keep moving. Now in this day and age, there are CCTV cameras everywhere, well, use them, try walking past a camera or two to catch the stalker’s face, if they’re not wearing something that covers it or in some cases, they’re smart enough to not walk past it, but take another route. Anyway, it’s worth a shot, so you can tell the police about it and they can get to the location of the camera that captured the stalker in action and identify the perp for an arrest. Nothings off the table, especially if the situation demands it. Just assess the situation first and then act accordingly. Which requires a lot of psychological training and experience helps as well. Remember, doing it and reading about it are two very different things. Moving on…

 

Distraction

Next, after you have identified the threat, you have to formulate a strategy to lose the stalker. How do you lose them? Well, you make them take their focus off of you or at least make them focus on something else for a while. How do you do that? That depends on the situation you’re in at the time. Improvisational skills come in handy during this process. For example, if you see a police officer, walk up to them and ask for directions, but make sure the stalker isn’t within the hearing range of you, that way, all they’ll see is you talking to a police officer. Which will slow them down, create doubt in their minds about why you would spontaneously talk to an officer. Of course, you can just report the stalker by pointing directly at them and be like…“He did it!!! He’s the stalker!!!” But here’s the (sort of) down side to that. Doing that, would most likely alert the stalker, making them flee, if they‘re at a distance from you and the officer, they‘ll most likely escape successfully. Sure, you will be temporarily free, but they will be more prepared next time, and if the stalker is persistent, you can be sure, they‘ll be more careful so as to not be spotted and more alert of your “moves“ and observational capabilities. Once they know that you know, the element of surprise is not in your favor now. Next…

 

Confusion

Confusion is a part of distraction, the distraction should be enough of an attention grabber that it confuses the stalker. After their focus has been taken off you, putting it back on you would be hard especially if you’ve already started moving. You could either lose them in the crowd or at a corner or in a building or at a shop in a shopping mall, you can lose virtually anyone by cleverly timing it and using objects or people that block the stalker‘s view of their target (you).

 

Opportunity

The confusion is the part where your opportunity is created for you to escape. Before initiating your distraction and creating confusion for the stalker, you need to have an exit strategy prepared. A low profile, but effective exit strategy. Don’t start looking for an exit after the distraction and/or during the confusion or it will just backfire and chances are, you won’t be able escape, instead will return to the previous situation with the stalker still on you. This time they’ll be much more careful not to lose you, especially considering the fact that they almost did and now they know that you’re someone who knows about them, who knows what they’re doing and someone who cannot be underestimated. Remember, if you lose the element of surprise the first time, there usually is no second chance. Lightning doesn’t strike twice in one place, at least not always.

 

Action

Finally comes the action, now by action I don’t mean find the guy and stalk him back then “kick his ass” for stalking you. You’re not Jason Bourne for heaven’s sake! Nope. So stop trying to be. ‘Action’ is you getting home, calling the police, reporting the stalker, identify the stalker if you can, or at least give a rough description. Or you can also get to a police station directly, to report the stalker in person. Then get home immediately, possibly after checking that you’re not still being followed (yes, there have been cases where the victims were followed by the stalker from a police station, even after they were reported, some are that persistent/daring/stupid/desperate). Then take a taxi or other similar service like Uber or Ola (if you‘re in my country here) rather than a bus or train, wait for the car in the police station until it arrives or stay hidden in a public place (if you didn‘t go to the police station first).
If you’re in doubt of still being followed, (Remember I said doubt, not paranoid) then make sure you ask the driver to drive around your area for a minute or two, see if someone’s following your driving pattern before you get to your destination (house or office). Oh and please, don’t try and confront the stalker like, “Leave me alone you BASTARD!!! I’M NOT SCARED OF YOU!!!” No. Absolutely not. That’s a biiig NO! That’ll be you giving away the fact that you know about their existence. Remember, they shouldn’t know that you know about them till they’re caught or they‘ll escape or become more dangerous and aggressively make their move on you, their target.
Another thing, never try to lure them into a secluded place for what you think would be an “ambush”, even if you have called the police or your friend or someone, things can go real wrong real fast in a matter of seconds. Remember, you’re not Jason Bourne and THIS IS NOT A MOVIE. They might have accomplices, they may have set up an ambush for you instead. They could have weapons or toxic/acidic chemicals. They may want to kidnap you and take you to a second location, which would be an easy thing to do in a secluded place.
Try remaining in a public place where it’s not too crowded and not too secluded, you should see them coming and so should the individuals around you, if the stalker intends to stab you subtly, then over-crowded places with people distracted or excited or focused on something else, places like over-crowded clubs with low lighting, for example, could work to the stalker’s advantage, not yours. But places like a fairly crowded public park or a fairly crowded street in broad daylight could work in your favor of losing them or creating a distraction and confusion, for you to escape.

 

Final Thoughts

You can practice the above process in your daily life, especially the observational part. It helps a lot if you notice the little things around you. Plus, it’s good for the development of your cognitive abilities.
You see, the thing about stalking is often it’s more psychologically damaging than physically. It happens more commonly than most think. Sometimes, it’s subtle, sometimes, it’s painfully obvious. Whether it’s done officially or illegally, stalking/surveillance, if done enough, it can torment the target more than any other kind of physical torture.
Certain stalking methods can be excruciatingly painful for the target. Especially because they can’t report it, as either there is no physical evidence of it happening or all evidence, if any, is circumstantial. So, stalking is not a matter to be taken as a low-threat act. It’s actually one of the more effective ways to break, scare and manipulate a potential target. Training to avoid being a victim of stalking requires more psychological training than anything else. Train your mind to be strong and resilient and you won’t break down under pressure nor will you have to use your fists, you will come out on top, because you will learn to go toe-to-toe with your tormentor, that is, if you can’t stay ahead of them.

 

So, Finally! That’s it, this is the end of the ‘Losing Tail’ articles.

I hope you found the information useful. I tried my best to get the info packed in both of them. Any additional comments are welcome… and, as usual, Thanks for reading!

Losing Tail (Part – 1)

I was watching a video about stalkers today. You know, as we all do everyday and I remembered I wrote an article about the predator mindset, behavior etc. So I was just contemplating some things about stalkers and how they behave and what goes through their minds, etc. While doing that I would come up with some counter measures to escape a stalker. Actually there are different kinds of stalking and tailing, it could be a PI tailing the target or the target is under surveillance for some reason, or a bounty hunter is sent after the target, etc. etc. It can be on foot or in vehicle/s.

In this article, I’m just gonna write about counter-measures for a “generic” stalker rather than a PI or Bounty Hunter, etc. Why? Because I don’t want to give any ideas to potential criminals to escape, that’s why. I prefer helping the non-criminals understand these things.
So! Firstly, here’s what you need to know how the professional surveillance individuals prep to tail their subjects and some of their methods (not in too much detail of course, just some basics). Now, A guy obsessed with a woman or a woman obsessed with a guy are different kind of stalkers, they usually make their presence known and mostly don‘t care if their victims know about them, in fact some purposely want to be known.

That’s unlike a professional tail who will be a ghost, a gray man, they will never make themselves known, no identifying features on any part of the body, normal clothing, no identifying jewelry (rings, etc), common haircuts, no facial hair or common facial hair, no scars or unique behavior that would stand out, no excessive muscles, average height, etc. Nothing to draw attention to themselves from anyone which includes their targets. They are the most plain and average looking individuals you’ll ever see or not see. They blend in perfectly just about anywhere.

So here’s the thing, since I’ve started this, I’ll make this post a kind of two-in-one article from both perspectives, or more like a two part actually;
– Surveillance (Which is a sophisticated term for stalking)
– Counter-Surveillance (Which is a sophisticated term for identifying and escaping or catching a stalker or becoming a stalker of the stalker and then catching the stalker).

A civilian version of the topic, if you will.

So, in case if anyone asks, Why aren’t you merging the two? Well, that’s simple, it’s because I don’t want to and because I‘m not too lazy to write two different articles. So…yeah, don‘t sue me, I‘m poor 😦

Now bad jokes aside, let’s begin, shall we?

First let’s start with the different method types for surveillance.

There are different types of surveillance, and some of them are as follows;

  • The type where there are teams who are posted in different zones, as the subject moves from zone to zone, the teams get activated and they report the target’s activity in their zones. It’s very hard to detect, even for someone with training.
  • The type where the teams get rotated everyday. The individuals stalking you today, won’t be there tomorrow. Which makes it harder for the target to identify the stalker/s or even know about their existence.
  • The type where they monitor your net, phone, credit/debit card and banking activities a.k.a. Cyber Stalking.
  • The type where they are just vetting the target for kidnapping or something. It includes keeping a tab on the target’s routine of their daily activities, I.e. the time they leave the house, the time they get back, the routes they use, the time they walk the dog, etc. It can be and usually is done from a distance.
  • The type where they keep a very close and constant watch on the target, including planting microphones in the target’s house.

There are a few more, but right now I can only remember these.

However, the two main categories are;

  1. Stationary surveillance (stakeout) where operative/s stay in one place to monitor the target.
  2. Mobile surveillance (tailing or shadowing) where operative/s or teams move with the target/s (foot or vehicle/s).

 

Here’s a mini/condensed list of preparations that are made by surveillance operatives;

  1. Gathering intel about the target.
  2. Getting to know the routine.
  3. Getting to know their target’s contacts, friends and acquaintances.
  4. Noting down the details of the target’s car/bike – plates, make, model, color, etc.
  5. Locating entrances, exits and vantage points to gain further advantage.
  6. Recon – Getting to know the neighborhood structures they’re gonna be operating in.
  7. Knowing the environment and people so they know how to blend in and not raise suspicion.
  8. Plan routes based on the traveling intel of the target (if they’re going for a mobile surveillance).
  9. If they carry a weapon, they make sure that bulges don’t show. That might attract an unwanted third-party attention.
  10. They’re gray men, they do not attract any attention.

 

A mini list of things that are used/done;

  1. Clothes appropriate for where they’re gonna be, to blend in with the environment and with the people in it.
  2. Surveillance equipment (depends on who they’re tailing, the purpose and the kind of surveillance it is).
  3. A reliable car, that’s not too new and attention grabbing or so old and beat up that they earn the suspicions of the individuals in the neighborhood. They fill it up properly so as to not run out of gas while tailing (if conducting mobile surveillance).
  4. They usually will have a cover story ready in case someone questions their intentions for being in the area. They avoid being truthful even if they’re legally doing so, because that may alert their target, effectively wrecking their operation.

 

So you got an idea about how pro surveillance works? Good. Now, an average stalker just about never is that careful or goes through that much trouble to stalk their target. Depends on their reason for stalking though, but still, they’re usually amateurs who can get easily caught and even scared off in many cases. An average stalker is light years behind a pro, so they’re usually easily identified.

 

Notice:

  • Surveillance is illegal, at least for civilians. So unless and until it’s your job and are licensed and paid to do so, officially, don’t do it. Remember the definition I wrote above? Yeah. It’s stalking. Regardless of the ‘term’ used.
  • There’s much more to surveillance than I mentioned above, but I don’t wanna include a lot of it here, because as I wrote earlier, I don’t wanna give any ideas to the wrong kind of people. Internet has already a lot of dangerous stuff to offer, I don’t think I’d like to contribute to that. I just wrote these things, to show you things from the perspective from a ‘pro stalker‘. An “advanced” stalker. Think of it this way, if you can identify a professional, you will be able to identify an amateur, an obvious stalker with relative ease. Which would give you an upper hand and more options to deal with them. So, win-win. Make sense? Good.

 

Anyway, if this doesn’t interest you, then you can directly move on to Part – 2.

Effects of Adrenal Stress on a human body

When a situation occurs that causes panic and shock, the human body experiences a state of being called the ‘Adrenal Stress Response’. During that time, our body undergoes drastic changes to help us warn and adapt to the situation so we can act/react accordingly to it, in order to survive.

 

There are a lot of things going on during that time, they happen simultaneously on a cellular basis. The sympathetic nervous system stimulates the fight or flight response. It is definitely a long and complicated list. Down below I’m writing down a shorter version of that list;

 

Here are some of the effects on a human body that is under adrenal stress;

  • Blurry vision
  • Tunnel vision
  • Distorted Hearing
  • Shaky hands
  • Profuse Sweating
  • Rapid heart beat
  • Heavy breathing
  • Pit in the Stomach (due to metabolism slowing down during fight or flight response)
  • Numbness in the extremities
  • Lack of/Minimal use of coordination and fine motor movements
  • Fear and panic causes impulse and instinct based thinking from the reptilian brain – basal ganglia, rather than emotion-based from the paleomammalian – limbic brain or logic-based from the neomammalian brain – neocortex.
  • Weak/Trembling knees
  • Physical Temperature drop (due to blood draining from unnecessary parts of the body to provide extra blood/oxygen supply for actions during fight or flight response)
  • Time distortion
  • Extreme psychological stress due to the release of 4 major stress hormones; Epinephrine, Norepinephrine, Cortisol and Cortisone.
  • Many have also been known to void their bladders and/or bowels during highly stressful situations.
  • Many lose sense of direction. That’s why many who go through extremely stressful situations, can’t remember their names or tell left from right, if asked in the moment.

 

There are also certain after-effects of such situations. Some of these are temporary but some of them last quite a long time, this depends on factors such as the psychological resilience of the individual and/or the level of threat of the situation they’re in.

 

The effects are as follows;

  • Paranoia and Continued Fear
  • Trembling limbs
  • Chronic Psychological trauma
  • Fever
  • Reclusive behavior
  • Loss of confidence
  • Loss of or distorted short-term memory, especially the exact details of the situation.

 

These are just some of the changes and effects that a human body undergoes during and after a traumatic event. The event that causes stress, doesn’t necessarily have to be violence-related, it can be any situation that would cause enough trauma via psychological or physical means, resulting in the body’s reaction to it.

 

An example of this would be someone who has been in a car accident or someone who’s had a strong, aggressive verbal argument with someone  or an individual who’s just been on a roller-coaster for the first-time (this is a very low level of stress caused by the hormone; Adrenaline).

 

The effects mostly wear off after 30-60 minutes due to the parasympathetic nervous system activating  back again and “reversing” – (it’s technically not reversing, but just restoring the body to it’s natural resting state) – the effects of the sympathetic nervous system’s actions during the fight or flight response.

The effects of stress vary for different individuals in different situations, the effects are also based on the levels of stress caused to the individual. For example, someone who has been on a roller-coaster won’t be traumatized for life, unless they have acrophobia of course. But someone who has just been rescued from a blazing building will experience some sort of trauma and might even develop a phobia of fire (pyrophobia) if they don’t seek help after the event.

These effects can be reduced, but not erased, they’re a part of us, no matter how much you train or experience them on a daily basis, they will kick in when you’re in a stressful situation. It’s evolutionary biology. But as I said, training and/or experiencing them regularly can help reduce those effects so as to not let them overwhelm you when you least expect them to.

 

You cannot control that state of mind and body, but you sure can train and condition yourself to function competently with moderate effectiveness under those conditions to ensure your survival, possibly others survival as well, and save yourself from a long lasting psychological trauma.

 

This topic is actually a very vast subject of study, but I tried my best to compress as much as I could in one article to provide as much information as possible. Hope you liked reading it and find it useful. Thanks for reading.

Measuring the level of consciousness

In today’s article I am going to write about measuring the level of consciousness of a person. The method used is called The Glasgow Coma Scale. The Glasgow Coma Scale (a.k.a. GCS) is a measurement of a patients level of consciousness.

 

Although it was initially used just for individuals who had suffered head injuries, it is now used by doctors and EMTs for all acute medical and trauma patients and is also used in chronic patients in intensive care units.

 

The Glasgow Coma Scale contains three measurements: Eyes, Verbal and Motor. Each measurement is assigned a score and the GCS is the total of the three scores combined. The minimum GCS score is 3, which is completely unconscious, and the maximum is 15 which is fully alert.

 

The individual components of the Glasgow Coma Scale and how the individual measurements are scored are as follows;

 

Observation: Eyes.

Responses:

  • Open spontaneously                     Score: 4
  • Open to speech                              Score: 3
  • Open to painful stimulus             Score: 2
  • No response (no eye opening)    Score: 1

 

Observation: Verbal.

Responses:

  • Responds sensibly                    Score: 5
  • Confused                                     Score: 4
  • Inappropriate words                Score: 3
  • Incomprehensible sounds      Score: 2
  • No response (silent)                 Score: 1

 

Observation: Motor.

Responses:

  • Obeys commands                                                                       Score: 6
  • Points (localizes) to pain                                                          Score: 5
  • Withdraws from pain                                                                Score: 4
  • Bends limbs in response to pain (flexion)                           Score: 3
  • Straighten limbs in response to pain (extension)             Score: 2
  • No response                                                                                Score: 1

 

 

A GCS of less than 8 is generally considered a serious medical emergency due to problems with the airway. Patients who have a GCS less than 8 are unlikely to be able to protect their airway and are at risk of hypoxia.

It’s important to remember that GCS scores can fluctuate minute-by-minute, especially in critical patients.

However, like everything, The Glasgow Coma Scale isn’t perfect. Various factors such as alcohol & drugs can distort a casualties true level of consciousness, especially in a head injury situation.

 

This can be especially useful thing to know for people whose jobs entail the danger of dealing with head injuries or any other injuries that cause shock and loss of consciousness. Not to mention it’s important information for Martial Arts instructors, Self Protection Instructors and Fitness Coaches as well.
So, I hope you found this information useful. Like and Share if you did. That’s it.

Thank you for reading.

Being a hard target

Anyone who has trained in some kind of effective combat method that focuses on violence and self-protection has heard the sentence “Be A Hard Target.” or something close to it.

What exactly does that mean? Well, when it’s said that be a ‘hard target‘, it doesn’t mean that you must look all tough and big and strong and mean and have an iron body. Nope. It just means that to a predator who is scouting for a prey, you must look like someone who will put up a really good fight making it harder for the predator to get what it wants.

It doesn’t matter if you’re big and mean looking, if an experienced predator sees that you won’t put up a fight or that you don’t know how to, the predator will capitalize on that.

There have been many instances where a bunch of smaller individuals or just one average size individual have brought down bigger guys, the only reason for that being is that the bigger guy didn’t want to put up a fight because he was afraid of hurting the “little guy” and so became a victim himself, that’s what happens when you don’t know when to use force and how much force you should use. There have also been cases where the bigger guy couldn’t put up a fight due to not knowing how to, he was frozen, especially when overwhelmed by more than one “smaller” guys.

If you haven’t seen any instances like them in real life, you can see a similar example of what I wrote, on sites like you tube and worldstar where smaller guys take down bigger ones. Of course, that kind of violence is different than asocial violence. But similar principles do apply. Thing is, size does matter, but only if it’s used properly, a big guy who can‘t or won‘t put up a fight, will become an easy target regardless of the size of both the predator and the victim. Sometimes due to sheer numbers or due to a vehement violent act.

Being a hard target is not about your body language screaming, “I‘m a big tough guy!!! I‘ll beat your ass up!!!!” No, it’s just about sending a subtle message of, “These are my boundaries and if you cross them, I will be forced to take drastic steps”. That’s what your body language should communicate. It shouldn’t be forced, it’s a natural thing. Once the message is received by the predator, it will choose another prey.

Regardless of size or gender, anyone can send this message. Even though an average individual might take some time to get that message, a predator, especially one with enough experience, will get it almost instantly. Selecting an easy mark is second nature to a predator and will almost never select a target who they think has a chance of fighting back. Why “almost”? Because sometimes desperate times, call for desperate measures, and if they are hell bent on killing you, it will be a different situation, like if someone has a personal vendetta against you and really wants to kill you, then body language goes out the window, but the hard target principles would still apply. In that case, the defender, will have to put up a violent enough fight, to either damage, injure and neutralize or discourage the assailant enough to hesitate or flinch due to fear, giving you the time to act and escape. That’s a different topic though.

Just a simple rule to follow is, ‘Don’t stick out like a sore thumb’. Those are usually the obviously easy targets.

Anyway, that’s it. This topic came to me while I was in the shower. TMI? Well, it’s the truth. I had some other points but they don’t come to my mind now. When they do, I’ll write a part two to this post. Thanks for reading.

 

The ‘off’ switch.

Violence is a complicated subject, with many aspects such as;
-Physical
-Psychological
-Environmental
-Consequential
-Moral
-Legal

 

There are different types of violence.

 

There is however a difference between a fight and violence. The difference being that two individuals in a fight willingly want to hurt each other, but in violence, it’s predator vs. prey. One inflicts harm to another in order to get what they want. The other just wants to survive.

 

Today, I’m not just going to write about violence though, no, today, I will also write about fights (as the article topic today applies to both). Fights happen when things aren’t resolved verbally, aren’t deescalated and as a result they get to a point where things become physical. Two individuals, who lose their tempers so badly, that they forget the consequences of their potential actions. This is usually called a ‘street fight’. It is not self defense, it is a fight. There is another kind of street fight, where two individuals compete against each other by fighting each other in an unsanctioned fight in a public place such as parking lots, etc. This is also a street fight. The minor difference being that the fight that takes place inside or outside of a bar (a.k.a. ‘bar fights’) is mostly due to drunken individuals not being able to keep calm and control their drunken rage. Remember, even though violence is different than street fighting, the ‘aspects of violence’ still apply when things get physically violent.

 

This is where the ‘off’ switch comes in. It is imperative to know when to act and not just how to act, as far as fighting and violence is concerned. Prevention is the best option of course, I always say that and make sure to mention it in my posts, it works majority of the time. If you are getting into violent confrontations on a regular basis, maybe you should consider making better life choices or try keeping a calmer demeanor. But if the situation does get out of control, even after preventive measures were taken and even after you tried your best to avoid it. Then comes the time to physically act. In this situation, your no.1 goal should be, not to fight and kill everyone in sight, but to escape to safety as quickly as possible. This is where the ‘off’ switch comes in, it is basically you keeping yourself in control and as calm as possible in an adrenaline charged situation.

 

The more angry you get, the more clumsy you will become, the more mistakes you will make. You will become so blind that you’ll forget what you are supposed to do, I.e. Survive. Hence the saying, ‘Blinded by rage’ This, ultimately will result in your inevitable demise. You will forget your priorities and focus on the wrong things. Your ego will take charge and drive you down suicide lane and straight to the hospital or morgue. Your best bet to survive a fight, or a violent confrontation is to keep your (metaphorical) finger on the ‘off’ switch.

 

How do you do that? Well, take an example of a road rage, a guy slams into your car, messes up your paint, what’s the average reaction of an individual? Getting out of the car and start yelling, yes? What next? Walking towards the vehicle that f’d up your paint, right? Then what? Banging on the window of that vehicle or if it’s a bike, just straight up getting into the face of that guy. Or if he drives off, I’ve even seen, some people get into the car, and driving violently to catch up to them and overtake them to stop them and confront them. So people go out of their way to start a fight, why? All because of a paint job. Yep. Seems reasonable to me… NOT!

 

First of all, your paint is already messed up, it’s not going to get better just because you beat up a guy, okay? Second, what makes you think you can actually beat that guy up? What if he has a weapon on him? Is your paint really worth being stabbed or shot? Third, why go look for a fight, when all you have to do is take the driver’s car number and report it to the police. That’s what the law is for, to solve these messes, so you don’t have to. Why would you want to risk yourself by starting a fight, when there are already people who are hired to resolve these things in a magical place called court. I know, many will say, but it’s a long process and the perp may not even be caught, etc. etc. well, if you don’t wanna bother with a long process of court, then maybe your paint wasn’t that important in the first place now, was it? So… my question, why is it that you wanted to risk your personal well being for it, if you didn‘t want to bother with the long process of courts? ‘sup with that, man? No. That just doesn’t make any sense, now does it.

 

Well, it does to you, because that’s the easy way, right? Well, easy ways aren’t always the safest ones. It’s because you don’t know how to use your ‘off’ switch. We all have our triggers, god knows I have mine (a lot of them… like major anger management issues… shh.. It‘s a secret though). The thing is I know how to use my ‘off’ switch. I have developed a kind of thick skin, I was actually forced to develop a thick skin. So there aren’t many things get me angry easily or even moderately easy.

 

The thing is, what I’m basically saying is that you need to calm the ‘F’ down. Not let every single annoying thing get you losing your temper. World is filled with them. Can’t lose your sanity every 5 minutes now, can you. Too stressful. Not good for health.

 

Anyway, back to the topic, there’s another situation where the ‘off’ switch is the most important. That is when you’re in a fight, like in it, during it. Know when to stop. Don’t just blindly keep on pounding on that poor moron who picked a fight with a freakin’ psychopath.

 

Learn to control your anger and know when to stop, because if you don’t stop, you will be stopped by someone else. It‘ll most likely be either the police (hello jail time) or the friends of the guy you’re beating on (hello hospital time). Don’t even for a second, think that you’re invincible, you’re not. If you let your rage direct your actions, things will not end well for you. The consequences will be dire.

 

So keep calm and learn to use the ‘off’ switch in your day to day life.

 

That’s it. Thank you for reading.

Regress – A lesson learned.

We all lose our ways sometimes, what matters is that we find our way back to continue our journey.

 

It all started today, as I started conducting a class, the most amazing, yet, disturbing thing happened. It was a real wake-up call for me. As an instructor I have always followed one simple saying, “You teach what you can do”. Unfortunately, today I failed to follow that saying. I didn’t think his day would come, I might’ve known it subconsciously, but I never paid much attention to it and that was my mistake, because it did arrive and I failed myself, but like I said, it was a wake-up call for me.

 

The titles of instructor/teacher/coach, etc mean something. Individuals with this title have a responsibility towards whom they impart knowledge on. The knowledge should not only be of excellent quality and effective, but it should also be something that the instructor him/herself can actually apply and have in depth understanding of.

 

I’m gonna go back a few years here. When I started my training I was a child at 8 years old. I trained through my teenage years and I was obsessive in my training. I didn’t let anything distract me or hold me back when I was training and even though I didn’t completely neglect it, not even my education was given that much of an importance by me. I would train every second of free time I’d get. My training not only consisted of combat training, but exercises too. From Cardio to Calisthenics/Body-weight training to Weight Training to Functional Workouts, etc. My diet was strict and I stuck to it for years. Everything in my life was centered around my training, everything was scheduled according to my training schedule.

 

This continued until the year 2010, before I had other things to worry about in my life. When I returned home from my training, certain events led me to start teaching what I had trained in over the years, I had to be practical and start making money, doing nothing but training all day and night wasn’t gonna feed me.

 

That is when the downfall started, but it wasn’t noticeable… at first.

Now leaving my training obsession, I shifted it to getting my career up. When it comes to my life decisions, I’m the kind of individual, that focuses a 100% on one thing, one goal first and I don’t let go until it’s done.

 

But my training was still number one, and I had to adapt and evolve. Learn to divide my attention and focus on two things simultaneously. As time passed, I did my best to do exactly that. I tried to manage my training and my workouts with trying to get my career up and running. It wasn’t perfect, but it was holding up. I was holding up.

 
It went on relatively smoothly for the next two years, but as the responsibilities of my career began to grow in numbers, the time for my training and workouts got shorter and shorter, to the point where, by the beginning of 2013, I usually had to make a choice, whether to train in Combat techniques or workout. I would either be too tired to do both or got time to do only one of the two things… or so I thought at the time.

 

That led me to choosing my combat training most of the time. They were less exhausting to me. This was my mistake. A big mistake. I now realize that lack of time management skills led me to do that. I could’ve easily fit a 15 minutes workout in a day. I had 15 minutes. So, by the end of 2013, I was mostly focused more on combat training and only a few exercises, like bench-press, push-ups, crunches and pull-ups. I maintained my diet throughout all this, but diet without exercise isn’t that effective, it helps you maintain your level at max, but overtime it inevitably goes down nonetheless.

 

So, the above continued till mid 2014, then one day, it was in the summer and summers in India can get scorching hot. Hell is cooler than India in summer. Anyway, one day I came home from my class and there it was, I had no energy left (I wonder why..). So my first stupid inaction of the year 2014 happened. I just came home, washed up and went straight to bed, slept till 10 in the morning, it was a solid 12 hrs sleep, I do mean solid, like if you had hit me with a brick on the face, I wouldn‘t even have noticed it. First time I had slept that much, that deep. Next day, It was a Sunday, I got up, brushed my teeth and there lay two choices in front of me, go back to bed or get some workout done. Guess which one I chose? That’s right, I made my second stupid choice and went to bed. I wasn’t tired by the way, I was just too lazy.

 

From there, it was a series of similarly stupid choices, which by the end of 2014, led me to stop just about every exercise I used to do. In the end of 2014 and all of 2015, all I did, was an hour of combat training and just a few major muscle groups stretches before that. Just to note, this wasn’t some average individual trying to get into shape, this was an instructor who was supposed to teach people how to do that.

 

I kept thinking I’m still in good shape, blah-blah-blah and was blind to what I was doing to myself, how I was losing everything I worked hard for over a decade, in just a few months. I never felt tired while conducting my classes, so I thought I was in good shape, but what I failed to realize is that majority of my students/clients, were either beginners and hadn’t worked out before in their lives or the fact that THEY WEREN”T MY INSTURCTORS, I WAS THEIRS. I was stupidly comparing myself to them when I should’ve compared myself to the actual individuals who are at their peak level or at least should’ve compared myself to my younger self.

 

Today all of those mistakes came back to haunt me, when my lack of stamina and endurance got me tired by running a few kilometers. The guy who used to run, not jog, run on the beach every morning with 20 kgs on him for 2 hours, got tired in 30 minutes without wearing any weights in front of the security personnel I was supposed to be training to get in the best shape of their lives.

 

The most embarrassing moment of my life yet, was today. But I’m glad it happened, as it opened my eyes to my past and present mistakes and my lazy choices early on, before I did further damage to myself. I’m almost in my mid 20’s and today made me realize that my young physiology is not going to help me forever. I am responsible for myself and when I get to the point in my life where my body doesn’t function the same way it does now, it’ll be the things that I do now that will help me to not crumble and instead be a physically fit and active individual who can enjoy life on his two legs.

 

After, today’s jolt to my brain, I made myself a promise, to get myself to the point where I’d reached before all this stupidity and then exceed that level. If I don’t have time, I’ll make time to take care of myself first. No more shortcuts. No more easy way outs. I’m going to become worthy of the title of an Instructor and accept the responsibilities that come with it.

 

So I’ve given myself a deadline of 3 months to get my stamina and endurance back to my previous level. Then after achieving that, I’ll continue to get it higher and start working on other aspects like muscle mass and strength development immediately. By the end of this year, I will achieve my set goals and continue to improve further.

 

There are more than one lessons here that I’ve learned today, lessons that I’ve relearned and have a new level of respect for.

 

-One of them is that just because you’re an instructor, doesn’t mean you get to just let go of yourself and your responsibilities as an instructor, your responsibilities towards yourself, your clients/students and your teachings.

-The other one being, that an instructor should first and foremost continuously make him/herself better each and every day of their lives. It’s a journey, with many goals that you keep completing for self-betterment and to make yourself a better teacher.

-This is probably the most important and this is something I always tend to live my life by and apparently the one that I have relearned in the harshest way possible for an instructor, (being embarrassed in front of the ones I was teaching), it is to maintain balance in whatever you do. That includes training. All I did was focus on just one type of training and let my physical fitness level fall in the process, I regressed. Whether you train Martial Arts, Sport Combat or Self Defense or anything else really, your physical fitness should never be neglected, always strive to do better.

– Finally, a thought came to my mind which made me be determined to get back to my level and beyond. A great teacher helps mold a great future for the ones they influence.

– Not to mention an obvious lesson, that being lazy and procrastinating doesn’t pay off in the long run.

 

Like I said in the beginning of this article, we all lose our way sometimes, what matters is that we find our way back. We are humans, we are flawed, we make mistakes, but it’s the repeating of those mistakes, that we should avoid, and I personally, will try my best to do so in the days to come.

 

That’s it. Thank you for reading.